I got into this interesting debate with my friend yesterday.
He sprays on this branded perfume (I am sure you've heard of it -- one of the more prominent brands). Oblivious of which one it was, I immediately go... "Ouch! That one's pungent". He responds saying something to the effect that I ought not to dislike this particular scent if I wanted to be called "classy" because it's so-and-so brand.
Which brings me to an interesting point: My belief is that a person seriously ought to have self-esteem issues if (s)he needs to sport brand(s) to make him/her feel good about himself/herself. Moreover, these brands come at an obnoxiously high price: Nil return on investment.
I principally disapprove of the practice of sporting brands in consumer products of daily wear or use.
Just wanted to voice this thought out into the universe and see what I get back :-) Can someone convince me otherwise?
Some points of clarification btw:
1. My intention is certainly not to undermine the importance of quality here. Quality is very important to me. But to pay a HUGE incremental price just for a name, is inane, in my opinion.
2. My intention is not to undermine the importance of class and sophistication here. My point is that you can be dignified, classy, suave etc etc without the need for brands. Class is so much more innate than that. Some people just have it and some people do not. Brands cannot really do that much more for you either ways.
3. My intention is not to undermine the importance of projecting your true worth (materialistically; and by extension intellectually, socially, professionally) to the people who matter. But to pay humongous price (of any sort) to get acceptance and recognition from people (who do or do not matter) is a futile exercise. I believe that if certain people cannot accept you for who you are fundamentally, stripped of all this external show, it's either because they are hugely narrow minded or because they cannot make peace with the fact that you are different - more often than not in a better way (more secure, more self-assured, more self-aware) -- from them (in style, caliber, values, principles and so on)
Penny for your thoughts.......? :-)
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Another realization....
Yeah... Like my friend just said.... I am on fire!! :-)
Related to my previous blog (regarding my summer experience in Texas), but too important and deep to just figure as part of another blog... here is something else I realized:
I always thought of myself as a very independent, strong girl, always wanting to make my own independent decisions on professional and personal life - important or relatively inconsequential. Always trying to prove to myself and to the world that I can do everything my male colleagues can, never liking the feeling of being dependent in any way on anyone.
Having had to live alone and having had to think twice about little things like venturing into unsafe neighborhoods all by myself or having to go look at housing complexes and take little decisions about where to live; terrified and stranded all alone at home when a HUGE neighborhood doggy was just outside my door and I wanted to get out, but could not... I realized this... and I am ready to confess it now:
There is a very vulnerable side to me that I have been denying and running away from all this while... that needs protection and nurturing. There are times when I feel like running to someone I can completely trust like a little girl running to her daddy when there's a loud lightening strike or when someone snatches away her favorite toy. I miss that feeling where I know I am unconditionally taken care of -- in every possible way.
With growing up, comes the responsibility of taking care of oneself -- financially, physically, emotionally, professionally; and being responsible for the consequences of one's decisions.
Such a dichotomy right here between the side of me that enjoys the freedom, strength and independence coming from this opportunity; and the other side that pines for that nurturing and protecting figure I can go running to and trust all my vulnerabilities to and hide my face in his arms and not worry about the menacing world around.
Related to my previous blog (regarding my summer experience in Texas), but too important and deep to just figure as part of another blog... here is something else I realized:
I always thought of myself as a very independent, strong girl, always wanting to make my own independent decisions on professional and personal life - important or relatively inconsequential. Always trying to prove to myself and to the world that I can do everything my male colleagues can, never liking the feeling of being dependent in any way on anyone.
Having had to live alone and having had to think twice about little things like venturing into unsafe neighborhoods all by myself or having to go look at housing complexes and take little decisions about where to live; terrified and stranded all alone at home when a HUGE neighborhood doggy was just outside my door and I wanted to get out, but could not... I realized this... and I am ready to confess it now:
There is a very vulnerable side to me that I have been denying and running away from all this while... that needs protection and nurturing. There are times when I feel like running to someone I can completely trust like a little girl running to her daddy when there's a loud lightening strike or when someone snatches away her favorite toy. I miss that feeling where I know I am unconditionally taken care of -- in every possible way.
With growing up, comes the responsibility of taking care of oneself -- financially, physically, emotionally, professionally; and being responsible for the consequences of one's decisions.
Such a dichotomy right here between the side of me that enjoys the freedom, strength and independence coming from this opportunity; and the other side that pines for that nurturing and protecting figure I can go running to and trust all my vulnerabilities to and hide my face in his arms and not worry about the menacing world around.
Summer in Texas
As I pack my stuff up in boxes to ship it back to school after a 3-month stint in Dallas, Texas; I am thinking back at what I gained/learned from the last 3-months apart from a LOT (!) of Digital Signal Processing, which I won't bore you with :-)
Here's what I learned (most of you may know all this already, but I just learned it now.... better late than never!):
1. Relocation is painful! Takes several times longer than you'll anticipate.
2. Books are way (!) heavier and denser than clothes -- good idea to mix-and-match to spread out the weight and volume.
3. Those packing boxes do not come all ready-to-use and taped up. You need to start with assembling them first!
4. Living outside campus is just not the same as on-campus!! You need to sign elaborate legal leases on apartments.
5. Utilities (gas, sewage and water) are not included in the rent.
6. Electricity is not included in "Utilities". The apartment complex won't do it for you. You need to set up an electricity account on your own.
7. Most apartments are unfurnished! Buying a bed or matress for 3-months doesn't make any sense. Too much of a liability. Renting furniture is an option. But you'll soon realize that a sleeping bag is the best option. You become very flexible!
8. Living alone is scary and often unsafe. Particularly for a girl. Particularly when she doesn't know the geography of the new place.
9. I am scared of thunderstorms. And baby lizards in my house.
10. It makes a WORLD of a difference if you have friends in the new city. My friends here almost saved my life when I was terribly unwell one time.
11. Texas freeways are very different from California freeways. They have "service roads" alongside all the freeways here in Texas. I am scared of driving in Texas.
12. The airline industry has completely gone to the dogs!
My experience at the company I interned at:
1. Inspite of being a HUGE company with presence in most semi-conductor market segments; unlike certain other similarly sized companies; this company is very inclusive, very good to its employees, highly professional, very diverse in its work-force, dominated by students from certain mid-west schools :-)
2. The group I worked for was exceptionally good. They treated all the interns very specially. The people in the group are super-brilliant and yet super chilled out.
3. I learned to be more assertive.
4. I made some awesomely fantastic friends (who even taught me some Tamil :-) )
5. I learned a gigantic amount (technically) which broadened by exposure significantly.
All-in-all, it was a very enriching experience both technically and otherwise. I go back a stronger, wiser person!
Here's what I learned (most of you may know all this already, but I just learned it now.... better late than never!):
1. Relocation is painful! Takes several times longer than you'll anticipate.
2. Books are way (!) heavier and denser than clothes -- good idea to mix-and-match to spread out the weight and volume.
3. Those packing boxes do not come all ready-to-use and taped up. You need to start with assembling them first!
4. Living outside campus is just not the same as on-campus!! You need to sign elaborate legal leases on apartments.
5. Utilities (gas, sewage and water) are not included in the rent.
6. Electricity is not included in "Utilities". The apartment complex won't do it for you. You need to set up an electricity account on your own.
7. Most apartments are unfurnished! Buying a bed or matress for 3-months doesn't make any sense. Too much of a liability. Renting furniture is an option. But you'll soon realize that a sleeping bag is the best option. You become very flexible!
8. Living alone is scary and often unsafe. Particularly for a girl. Particularly when she doesn't know the geography of the new place.
9. I am scared of thunderstorms. And baby lizards in my house.
10. It makes a WORLD of a difference if you have friends in the new city. My friends here almost saved my life when I was terribly unwell one time.
11. Texas freeways are very different from California freeways. They have "service roads" alongside all the freeways here in Texas. I am scared of driving in Texas.
12. The airline industry has completely gone to the dogs!
My experience at the company I interned at:
1. Inspite of being a HUGE company with presence in most semi-conductor market segments; unlike certain other similarly sized companies; this company is very inclusive, very good to its employees, highly professional, very diverse in its work-force, dominated by students from certain mid-west schools :-)
2. The group I worked for was exceptionally good. They treated all the interns very specially. The people in the group are super-brilliant and yet super chilled out.
3. I learned to be more assertive.
4. I made some awesomely fantastic friends (who even taught me some Tamil :-) )
5. I learned a gigantic amount (technically) which broadened by exposure significantly.
All-in-all, it was a very enriching experience both technically and otherwise. I go back a stronger, wiser person!
Little, important things that I lost along the way.....
(It's been over a year since I last posted here, so please pardon me if I sound a little rusty at this... just that I've lost the touch!)
Since all my guy-friends couldn't stop talking about Michael Phelps and how is body is so perfectly suited for swimming and since all my female-friends couldn't stop raving about how cute Michael Phelps is; I couldn't help but follow his events at this year's Olympics. I was reminded of my school days when I saw the swimming events. We were forced to swim as little kids back in school. From Grade 1 to 7. I used to hate being thrown into the baby pool the first year - I didn't know how to float, I was scared of the water and scared of drowning. As the years passed, and we learned the art of keeping ourselves afloat and we were taught stroke after stroke (Oh my! How I hated Butterfly!); I started to love swimming. There was one time that I refused to get out of the pool... I swam 47 laps (to-and-fro across the length of the pool == 1 lap) in a span of a few hours; and then I was bed-ridden for days! :-) And now.... I haven't entered the water in over 9 years! I don't even own a swimming suit now! Actually I remember the last time I really entered the water. We were in Goa for a class trip a few years ago and all my friends went jet-skiing. I was horribly scared to begin with. I hadn't done something as wild. I refused to try it out. But then when I saw person after person thoroughly enjoy the experience, I figured it's definitely worth a try. Oh my goodness!!!! It's one of the most amazing things I have ever done. To feel that cold spray on your face is just such an exhilarating feeling!!! I even went into the ocean a second time. I was DRENCHED!
Speaking of all the things I truly loved that got left behind somewhere along the way..... I haven't touched a paintbrush (or a Mehndi cone) in more than 6 years. I used to spend more time painting than with my study books! I haven't worn my ghunghroos in about 7~8 years. They were my loyal companions through my high school days when I studied Indian Classical Dance.
Coming so far away from Bombay caused me to get accidentally distanced from some very good childhood friends. Some of those memories of friends from school (whom I have now gotten back in touch with through Facebook/Orkut) make me wonder whether it really was in this life-time that we grew up together, were team-mates on intra-school and inter-school tournaments, competed together on debates, carrom, throw-ball, sat together in class or worked together on team events. I wonder how we just lost touch. Some of them are now married, parents even(!). Wow! It's awefully scary how much has changed in like a decade!
Whether I like it or not, once school starts, deadlines and academic pressure builds up, I am sure even this one activity (writing) that I used to enjoy is going to get pushed into the background.
Anyhow, a year is a l-o-n-g period of time and a lot has changed since I wrote last. I look forward to writing about some of those things I have been through this last year.
Since all my guy-friends couldn't stop talking about Michael Phelps and how is body is so perfectly suited for swimming and since all my female-friends couldn't stop raving about how cute Michael Phelps is; I couldn't help but follow his events at this year's Olympics. I was reminded of my school days when I saw the swimming events. We were forced to swim as little kids back in school. From Grade 1 to 7. I used to hate being thrown into the baby pool the first year - I didn't know how to float, I was scared of the water and scared of drowning. As the years passed, and we learned the art of keeping ourselves afloat and we were taught stroke after stroke (Oh my! How I hated Butterfly!); I started to love swimming. There was one time that I refused to get out of the pool... I swam 47 laps (to-and-fro across the length of the pool == 1 lap) in a span of a few hours; and then I was bed-ridden for days! :-) And now.... I haven't entered the water in over 9 years! I don't even own a swimming suit now! Actually I remember the last time I really entered the water. We were in Goa for a class trip a few years ago and all my friends went jet-skiing. I was horribly scared to begin with. I hadn't done something as wild. I refused to try it out. But then when I saw person after person thoroughly enjoy the experience, I figured it's definitely worth a try. Oh my goodness!!!! It's one of the most amazing things I have ever done. To feel that cold spray on your face is just such an exhilarating feeling!!! I even went into the ocean a second time. I was DRENCHED!
Speaking of all the things I truly loved that got left behind somewhere along the way..... I haven't touched a paintbrush (or a Mehndi cone) in more than 6 years. I used to spend more time painting than with my study books! I haven't worn my ghunghroos in about 7~8 years. They were my loyal companions through my high school days when I studied Indian Classical Dance.
Coming so far away from Bombay caused me to get accidentally distanced from some very good childhood friends. Some of those memories of friends from school (whom I have now gotten back in touch with through Facebook/Orkut) make me wonder whether it really was in this life-time that we grew up together, were team-mates on intra-school and inter-school tournaments, competed together on debates, carrom, throw-ball, sat together in class or worked together on team events. I wonder how we just lost touch. Some of them are now married, parents even(!). Wow! It's awefully scary how much has changed in like a decade!
Whether I like it or not, once school starts, deadlines and academic pressure builds up, I am sure even this one activity (writing) that I used to enjoy is going to get pushed into the background.
Anyhow, a year is a l-o-n-g period of time and a lot has changed since I wrote last. I look forward to writing about some of those things I have been through this last year.
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Onions
(You are probably thinking - this girl has lost it big time... ONIONS???)
This place I am working at over summer has some collaboration with a bank somewhere and the people who own the bank grow onions (or something like that! Don't ask!).
So every year there is an 'Onion Day' when all the employees at this company get a huge bag of Walla Walla onions (yeah - even I hadn't heard of this 'brand' of onions).
Apparently these onions are amongst the sweetest onions around. So the employees take this Onion Day very seriously and are very emotional about the onions. My boss apparently has received complaints in the past over how 'his onions are bigger than mine' (I swear I am not kidding!)
I brought home a huge bag of these "sweet" onions last week. I am very fond of onions and use them pretty liberally in my cooking - I haven't exhausted my stock of old onions at home, but I am waiting to try these new ones out and figure out for myself what the fuss is all about :-)
This place I am working at over summer has some collaboration with a bank somewhere and the people who own the bank grow onions (or something like that! Don't ask!).
So every year there is an 'Onion Day' when all the employees at this company get a huge bag of Walla Walla onions (yeah - even I hadn't heard of this 'brand' of onions).
Apparently these onions are amongst the sweetest onions around. So the employees take this Onion Day very seriously and are very emotional about the onions. My boss apparently has received complaints in the past over how 'his onions are bigger than mine' (I swear I am not kidding!)
I brought home a huge bag of these "sweet" onions last week. I am very fond of onions and use them pretty liberally in my cooking - I haven't exhausted my stock of old onions at home, but I am waiting to try these new ones out and figure out for myself what the fuss is all about :-)
Saturday, July 14, 2007
Big company vs. small company; Digital vs. Analog
The Bay Area (Silicon Valley as its popularly called) has a huge number of opportunities for EE and CS graduates and it's obviously a tough decision for most graduating students whether to join one of the big, well-established organizations or to join one of the start-ups.
There are pros and cons of both, which probably everyone reading this would very well know about.
Most of my friends, just like me, went through this kind of dilemma at some point or the other. They all, at the end, I am sure, took a very well thought out and wise decision one way or the other!
I am fortunately not on the job market yet, but last summer, I interned at one of the big semi-conductor manufacturing firms, where I primarily worked on digital logic and microprocessor timing issues. The first few weeks were just amazing - lots of new concepts and tools to learn, lots of new people to interact with, my first exposure to the industry etc etc! After a month, I started getting a little tired of my work. There wasn't that much new stuff I could learn however hard I tried. I signed up for a Shakespeare independent study at school just to challenge myself intellectually and I still felt like I wasn't getting stimulated enough. The other problem I had is that I didn't quite like that feeling of not being recognized enough.
This summer, I am interning at a little family run company near campus. It manufactures audio products and I am working on the Analog ciruits that go into the back-end systems they design. I have been enjoying the experience a lot more than last summer. There is so much more freedom and flexibility, so much more of a personal touch. My boss brings me lunch everyday and drops me to the bus station (because two weeks ago I fell while running to catch the bus and wounded myself pretty bad), takes immense interest in my research - even helps me with ideas and guides me, takes great pains to understand Indian culture, the Indian society etc.
So then, does it matter more to have one of the big names on your resume or is a pleasant and satisfying experience more important? Maybe it's just a personal choice at the end of it! I guess, based on my limited exposure, I would go in for the latter. Actually... I dunno :-) All I know is that each of these experiences forces one to pause and redefine what one really needs to be truly satisfied on a personal and professional level.
I am liking this!
There are pros and cons of both, which probably everyone reading this would very well know about.
Most of my friends, just like me, went through this kind of dilemma at some point or the other. They all, at the end, I am sure, took a very well thought out and wise decision one way or the other!
I am fortunately not on the job market yet, but last summer, I interned at one of the big semi-conductor manufacturing firms, where I primarily worked on digital logic and microprocessor timing issues. The first few weeks were just amazing - lots of new concepts and tools to learn, lots of new people to interact with, my first exposure to the industry etc etc! After a month, I started getting a little tired of my work. There wasn't that much new stuff I could learn however hard I tried. I signed up for a Shakespeare independent study at school just to challenge myself intellectually and I still felt like I wasn't getting stimulated enough. The other problem I had is that I didn't quite like that feeling of not being recognized enough.
This summer, I am interning at a little family run company near campus. It manufactures audio products and I am working on the Analog ciruits that go into the back-end systems they design. I have been enjoying the experience a lot more than last summer. There is so much more freedom and flexibility, so much more of a personal touch. My boss brings me lunch everyday and drops me to the bus station (because two weeks ago I fell while running to catch the bus and wounded myself pretty bad), takes immense interest in my research - even helps me with ideas and guides me, takes great pains to understand Indian culture, the Indian society etc.
So then, does it matter more to have one of the big names on your resume or is a pleasant and satisfying experience more important? Maybe it's just a personal choice at the end of it! I guess, based on my limited exposure, I would go in for the latter. Actually... I dunno :-) All I know is that each of these experiences forces one to pause and redefine what one really needs to be truly satisfied on a personal and professional level.
I am liking this!
A nice barbeque afternoon... and a brief rendezvous with Jim Williams
Two students from my research group defended their PhD thesis last quarter and we had a little barbeque today in their honor at this really nice park in Palo Alto.
Some of my group members are married - so they brought their families along. The kids were thoroughly enjoying themselves!
Turns out Jim Williams of Linear Technology fame happened to live right across the road from the park and happened to know my advisor really well.
So my advisor invited him to join us for lunch. He came over to the park, talked to all of us about his work, about analog circuit design and about his current projects. Our group is obviously a great fan of his - the coolest Op-Amps, the best Switchers, the nicest temperature sensors that our lab uses all come from Linear Tech!
Since alcoholic beverages were prohibited at the park, one of our group members cut open a little hole in a watermelon and injected vodka into it and let it soak over-night. It tasted really yummy. The portion of the melon right near the hole obviously had the highest concentration of vodka and Jim Williams merrily enjoyed and relished it.
I notice that I am really beginning to love Analog circuits!! :-)
Some of my group members are married - so they brought their families along. The kids were thoroughly enjoying themselves!
Turns out Jim Williams of Linear Technology fame happened to live right across the road from the park and happened to know my advisor really well.
So my advisor invited him to join us for lunch. He came over to the park, talked to all of us about his work, about analog circuit design and about his current projects. Our group is obviously a great fan of his - the coolest Op-Amps, the best Switchers, the nicest temperature sensors that our lab uses all come from Linear Tech!
Since alcoholic beverages were prohibited at the park, one of our group members cut open a little hole in a watermelon and injected vodka into it and let it soak over-night. It tasted really yummy. The portion of the melon right near the hole obviously had the highest concentration of vodka and Jim Williams merrily enjoyed and relished it.
I notice that I am really beginning to love Analog circuits!! :-)
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